Have you ever felt like you can’t tell anybody what you’re going through? Would your world fall apart if people knew what you were carrying? Have you ever entertained the thought of how relieving it would feel if one day you didn’t have to deal with what you’re going through? Have you reached a point where harming yourself is a possibility?

Adolescents can present themselves as social, nonchalant, and confident. They are hungry for independence and freedom. They are seeking new experiences and attempting to create an identity.  Socializing and starting to have independent experiences are appropriate and essential to an adolescent’s development. 

However, adolescents are still children who need structure and guidance. They are not adults, despite the fact that they may take on responsibilities like jobs, college classes, and driving. 

A bad grade, being benched, a damaged family car, are just a handful of situations that can be challenging for an adolescent to navigate. How will friends, peers, teachers, coaches, and parents respond? What will they think? What will the consequences be? How will these situations impact the future?

Are adolescents experiencing a balance between being told the consequences for their actions and having conversations about what is important to them? If there isn’t a balance, who can an adolescent turn to when they feel like their world is collapsing? If there is fear in not being able to reveal a failed exam, how would an adolescent navigate not getting into a desired college? Would an inebriated adolescent be able to call for help when a social event becomes uncomfortable, even unsafe? 

Setbacks are unavoidable. We can learn a lot about ourselves and others by how we respond to them. Do we shut down, cry, avoid, or ruminate when something out of our control disrupts our lives? 

Being a parent is rewarding, wonderful, and sometimes disappointing. We want what is best for our children and sometimes it is hard not to let our own choices interfere with what our children need. Sometimes it takes an outsider to help us help our children. Therapists are there to help guide and be objective listeners. Therapists can support adolescents to safely explore their inner world and assess their ability to cope with difficult situations.